Done unconsciously, they become routines. Some of what I do each day has become a routine. Some of the things I do involve only little bits of time and taking the next little step. For instance when I pour my last cup of coffee, the carafe if rinsed, and grounds from the basket emptied. Before starting to cook the sink is filled with wash water so we can clean as we go. When I do laundry, once dried it is folded and put away. It would be nice to say (but I don't lie) I never get sidetracked. I do. I've sipped many cold cups of coffee as evidence. That must come with age. These help me accomplish needed tasks, and allow me time to be with our kids, teaching and mentoring. Given that I tend to be sidetracked, as well as over 50 and prone to strong evidence of forgetfulness, routines help me accomplish my bare minimum as a wife and mother.
But, isn't life supposed to offer more? You would think so, and that was one of the reasons Marion and I began writing our thoughts and experiences. It isn't that we believe we have the answer. It isn't that we believe our "way" is the only one. One glance through all the posts we've written to "The Little Way" group is evidence that as our lives have adjusted so have our thoughts. We hope that in the end it is just refinement, but that will be for others to judge, if they feel so inclined.
What we do hope is that you can discover that by doing all those mundane (and sometimes not so fun) tasks that a mother does each and every day, coupled with consciously offering them up with love, you'll find your load lightened, your days flowing smoother, and your domestic church strengthened.
All the little "ways" that I do help me stay on top of the housework. That is, most of the time. I've also humbly discovered that when I get slack, things can seem to fall apart. There are days when I simply don't want to "do" anything, or when I am ill, and simply can't. If, however, I have kept true to "doing the next little step" each day I can usually afford to take a day off now and then.
Oh! One note on doing small things with great love. This requires an act of will. After all, scrubbing down a shower floor is hardly romantic. But, if I allow myself to act out of resentment, our domestic church becomes distorted. If I also allow myself to be exposed too much to that harsh world, whether via on-line sources, newspapers, television my thinking can become distorted. It isn't out of pride, but I will say that I don't know what Oprah is thinking or pushing, and I could honestly care less about how "wise" Judge Judy is. I do care about whether I am a loving wife, good mother and I work at being more than just a "nice person."
That act of will to love can be easy sometimes. But, usually, I need to pare down my own exaggerated sense of self, and make a firm act of the will to love. By paring down my "self", though, I don't neglect to take care of my physical, emotional and spiritual needs. It can be a balancing act, balancing what I need with what my family needs. We often need to balance family activities with outside obligations. It becomes easier when you realize you can do a lot, just not all at the same time. But each moment is precious, and can never return to be used again. I don't think I can save time, but I can be frugal with what time I do have so tasks aren't relegated to the future to eat up more of those precious present moments.
Now, for accountability. I'll let you all know right now, I do not feel accountable to anyone except God (of course!), my husband and our children. If I don't post often, just know that I am being accountable to those to whom I've been entrusted. I'll share when I can, both on this blog, and my personal one. But, gosh, don't expect me to be writing every day. I never have, and I really don't intend to begin now.
What I do hope is to share bits and pieces of my own adventure on this journey, to help you realize what a wonderful vocation we all have as wives and mothers, and encourage you on your own journey.Good prayers for your day! Your Sister in the Trinity .... Yvonne
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